I Fucking Hate Snow!

Year: 2023
Medium: Acrylic on canvas
Dimensions: 30 × 40 inches
Artist: Andre Alsup
Inspiration: Skateboarding, winter frustration, seasonal boredom, and my completely irrational hatred of snow.

I've never understood why people get so excited when it snows. Everyone talks about how beautiful it is, how peaceful everything looks, and how magical winter can be. Meanwhile, I'm staring out the window thinking about how I can't go skateboarding.

For some people, snow means hot chocolate, cozy blankets, Christmas movies, and building snowmen. For me, it means my skateboard is essentially useless, everything is wet, and whatever plans I had to enjoy being outside are officially canceled.

And I fucking hate it.

That's where the idea for this painting came from.

I decided to take my frustration out on one of winter's most beloved characters: Frosty the Snowman. Except instead of singing, dancing, and spreading holiday cheer, Frosty is having a pretty terrible day. He's getting stabbed by a very angry version of me, who has clearly reached his breaking point with winter.

There's something so ridiculous about being genuinely angry at a snowman. Frosty didn't actually do anything wrong. He's just standing there existing, minding his own snowy business, and somehow he's become the physical embodiment of everything I hate about winter.

The painting features bright colors, exaggerated cartoon expressions, a very unfortunate snowman, and a happy little dog who seems completely unbothered by the chaos happening right next to him. There's even a skateboard lying on the ground, serving as a reminder of the one thing I'd rather be doing.

What makes this painting funny to me is how unnecessarily dramatic the entire situation is. It's such an extreme reaction to something as ordinary as the weather. Instead of accepting that it's snowing and finding something else to do, I've apparently decided that Frosty himself needs to be held accountable.

But underneath the ridiculousness, there's actually a little truth to it.

Skateboarding is one of those things that makes me genuinely happy. It's exercise, freedom, creativity, frustration, accomplishment, and therapy all rolled into one. When I'm skating, I'm not thinking about everything else going on in my life. I'm focused on what's right in front of me, what I want to try, and whether or not I'm about to eat shit.

When winter takes that away, I sometimes feel like I should just do absolutely nothing. It's almost like the entire world has hit pause, and I'm stuck waiting for everything to dry up so I can enjoy myself again.

I know that's dramatic. I know there are plenty of other things I could be doing. But sometimes being irrationally frustrated is part of being human, and sometimes the best way to deal with that frustration is to turn it into something completely absurd.

That's what I love about painting. I can take something as simple as being annoyed by the weather and turn it into a ridiculous cartoon scene that makes me laugh.

This painting isn't really about hating winter or having a personal vendetta against snowmen. It's about how something completely outside of our control can interfere with the things that make us happy, and how ridiculous our reactions can become when we feel stuck.

Sometimes life gives you obstacles to overcome. Sometimes it teaches you patience.

And sometimes it snows, your skateboard is useless, and Frosty has to pay the price.

Sorry, Frosty. Nothing personal. I just really wanted to skate.